Just what to do?



I find myself in a puzzle. Since becoming a mother 1 1/2 years ago, I find that my eyes have been opened to the world at large and the world outside myself. This is not to say that prior to this I was ignorant to other countries and cultures or even that I was apathetic to the issues that strike people all over the world, including my country. Quite the opposite. I revel in traveling to other countries and really interacting with the local people to fully immerse myself in their daily experiences. I have investigated studying cross-cultural communications in the hopes of opening the awareness of others I meet. I have donated when I could in the past to organizations I thought would really make a differene in the lives of folks that needed it and registered for fair trade items when I got married. I don't feel I've been completely blind to the world outside myself but what have I really done?



The phenomenon that has happened to me since the birth of my son is that a fog has lifted and I feel I must do something to bring people together to lend a hand and an ear as well as spotlight problems and solutions. This brings me to my puzzle. I don't quite know how to take action on these newfound feelings. I can sit here in my comfortable chair and think about all of this but I don't know how to put my thoughts into action. Writing it down can help to clarify but how is it going to help me to meet the challenges I come across? I want to travel to another country and hold the hand of someone who needs support. I want to make blankets or clothes or toys for homeless children and let them know there are people who care. As a certified massage therapist, I want to rub the back of a woman who takes care of her children, her house and her husband in much less convenient environments than I have and tell her I'm there to take care of her.



The problem is that I don't do these things. I get paralyzed with thought and can't melt through it to take action. I suppose one could say that awareness is the first step towards change but one could also say I'm hypocrytical to sit and lament about my biggest problem being that lack of motivation to help others. How does it all resolve itself? Where does the light shine in?

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