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This is me.

I'm 55 and happily married to the bestest man ever on the entire planet, he's 59- but before we met I never married-he never did either-and I was forever alone. I had and still have no family of any sort apart from my hubby and was tossed from one place to the next and treated like filth all my life from the second I was dragged kicking and screaming into this world.  I was never ever drug or booze addicted so no problem there-never done any sort of drugs and I have 1 glass of cream liqueurs a week! No criminal record/never arrested etc. 

Over various years I've been sexually assaulted, beaten up and raped and trampled on.

I was working 3 jobs a week Monday to Saturday and 1 on a Sunday so was working 7 days a week year after year and was quiet and did my best not to bother anyone but absolutely nobody wanted to know me unless they wanted something. They don't like those like me who are physically disabled, plain and large. Constantly told I'm unintelligent, stupid, useless etc. and I had it all through school from ages 5-16 from pupils and teachers. 

I have no qualifications other than 4 Level 2 Basic Certificates because to this day I still believe I'm stupid, useless etc. after having it rammed down my throat since I was born.  

In my 30s I had a severe breakdown, lost lost 5 stone in 3 months because I was eating 1 yoghurt every 4 weeks, just living on liquids and my nerves and on the rare occasion I did eat in public I had others telling me I'm too fat and ugly and should eat less, I couldn't eat any less than 1 yoghurt a month! I was getting thinner and thinner rapidly. I was seriously suicidal and had many overdoses and slashed wrists. The only things that kept me alive were my beloved pets, I would have actually killed myself if it wasn't for them.

Then in 2007 I met and married my hubby, I'm now f/t self-employed, live hundreds of miles away from where I lived/worked before, my weight is at it's normal for my height, I'm still very ''nervy'' but haven't tried to kill myself since 2007 and my hubby saved me from a life of self-destruct and unbelievable loneliness. 


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