A Bumpy Ride

Hi, my name is Blessing Akoko and I just want to share a little bit of my ride so far with you.

In October 3, 2020 just after the Covid, I decided it was time to move and take action because before then I live in my state where I everything in my life is moving in circles and I see no progress which led to the decision of my moving. Prior to the said date above, I spoke to a friend of mine who happens to be a male and we were both in a relationship then and he lives in the city I wished to move to. He accepted my coming as I only promised to stay for a month to enable me get my own place as living together with a man that I’m not yet married to is not part of my agenda, and in two weeks time after moving, he started acting strange and I asked him severally what the matter was but he keeps giving excuses, I seldom catch him taking calls discreetly or whenever we are together he will switch off his phone. Then one faithful day he asked me to go back home that he wants to travel and he won’t want me to be alone, of course I knew he was lying and just wanted me out so I started looking for a place with the little money I had but I couldn’t meet up cos life in the city is way expensive. While I was still searching and calling home for assistance because I can’t see myself going back to where I was, I got a call from one of my cousins who was just relocated to the city because of his job, he gave me a room and when I got there it was a big mess but I was so grateful that at this point I knew God has always been with me. After using the money I have to fix the ceiling and did a bit of renovation, I was able to use the money left to get a small school size bed which saved me from having cold in my chest due to sleeping on an ordinary floor. This brought me to the second chapter of my journey

After settling down, that was towards November 2020, I was literally out of cash and getting to feed became so hard for me, I started looking for job as I am a graduate with several administrative experience despite I studied philosophy in school, the city is so big that I had to leave the house every day looking for a job with no result, I almost got scammed, well if I had money I would have been scammed. I met people along the way, some job seekers like myself, some I really don’t know where to place, though been careful but I finally found a friend cos another of my friend back home introduced us together as she lives in this my new city. I would say my new friend and I are opposite cos I’m more of an introvert and she is the extroverted one. We became so close that there is no day that goes by that we don’t talk on the phone. At this point I knew that God has sent his helper to see me through this tough one because she saved me a lot knowing how things were with me, she introduced me to her siblings and parents and at that point I felt like I’m no longer alone and that I have a family now. The truth is despite being grateful for her family and her for taking care of me, I knew I still needed to work because of my responsibilities back home so I kept looking for job but no one was coming forth, I was stressed from the thoughts and questioning myself if I made the best decision leaving home in the first place and those thoughts kept lingering almost every day. On a faithful day after complaining to every ears that is willing to hear, someone recommended me to a place to become a typist and I got employed as the owner insisted on paying me #25,000, despite I knew the money could not go a long way because almost half of it was for transport to work, I felt it was better to leave the house always. I was diligent with doing my job but it got to a certain point where I couldn’t hold it anymore because my boss wasn’t the cleanest person I know, he uses the toilet without flushing and I felt so irritated coupled with the fact that he comes to my house uninvited claiming he was just passing by and acting all strange and weird and I felt this sudden danger so I had to quit the job.

By March 2021, I was back to square 1 of job hunting and feeding from hand to mouth but thank God I still have my friend who will steal her mom’s food stuffs when the mom wasn’t looking just to make sure I have food to it. I kept looking for job and applying till finally I got an interview with one company, I was employed as a business development manager for one of their startups and their starting pay was #40,000 but after a few month they asked me to manage a store they have for their security gadgets and electronics, it was exciting and I pulled so many sales because of the extra commission I get for any items sold. The business was owned by a couple and along the way I encountered an issue because the wife said she doesn’t like my method of getting clients which aside from their sales channel, I created my own channel to get buyers, I had to stop using my channel after she complained but the sales started dropping and it became an issue as she said I am no longer producing sales, it was one issue to another. I am the one that has one single rule and that is never to defile my work place as that is my source of livelihood, the husband started asking me out and at that moment I knew it was my cue to leave.

At this point, I started slipping with all the thoughts and negativity flooding my mind, I felt like I was suffocating, there was no savings as I usually send money home and I couldn’t even take proper care of myself, siblings calling for food or fees, my mom complaining and I felt the weight of the world on me, and one day I fell inside the bathroom, I dunno how I got there or why but I found myself thinking of ending it all there and then, tears flowing through my eyes as I was on the floor feeling sorry for myself, all of a sudden I heard my phone rang loudly that I jolted out of that state as I staggered to get up and answer the call but to my surprise it wasn’t a call, it was a video of a monk talking about life and it’s challenges and why giving up wasn’t an option. At this point I had to stop crying as I listened more and then it dawned on me that giving up on myself isn’t an option. That was the beginning of a new era for me