Absenteeism in parenting

You never know how absenteeism can affect the life of your children until they become shadows of themselves and their lives take a turn one can never go back on. Samia’s soul and dignity were smashed in a single day while that of Michael almost got dimmed were it not for his intelligence. Childhood is meant to be beautiful and all rosy, making all the memories with family and friends but that of Samia and Michael (not their real names) was different. Young naïve souls devoured by hungry wolves who portrayed themselves are family.

Samia's childhood at the family friend’s house brings heartache and tears. While her parents were away fending for her and her siblings she was left under the care of a family friend who would later cause her so much pain. She was raped by a father and his son while the supposed man’s wife ignored her cry for help. It is her ignorance that baffles her that she would let her husband and son do such an inhumane act and walk away with it, married to a beast and raising a wilder beast because the son later tried sodomizing Michael. They walked away with it because neither Samia nor Michael said a word to their parents.

Dear parents nobody is good enough to take care of your children. It is okay to seek help but while at it do communicate and engage with your children enough to know of the happenings even when you’re away. People are wicked and humanity is a language that most don’t understand so don’t entrust them entirely with the lives of your children as they might be destroying the lives you’re working so hard to build.

Samia and Michael’s offenders walked away with their crimes. So many are walking away because they have instilled so much fear in their victims that they can’t say it loudly and when they come of age to understand the damages they sustained they only manage to cry themselves to bed and live with it. They become so withdrawn and die from the inside wondering who would believe them years later and how they would perceive them and all over again they find themselves caged in the damage that moving on becomes just a dream they yearn to achieve.

Children’s body language never lies, if they refuse to go out to play with certain friends let them be, if they refuse to be left under the care of certain people look into it, something must be off and it is either making them feel sad and unwanted or hurting them further. If you don’t pay attention to those small messages they pass across they will never say a thing in the future no matter how big it is, have time for your children, you’re their strength and the only one who can love them genuinely and nurture them in the best ways possible. Don’t distance yourself from them because that gap will be filled with something bad or good but they will forever blame you for it, they will hate your parenting even when you meant a better life for them.

Finances are important in bringing up children but they are not everything they need. Be there for them emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually and you won’t beat yourself for how they turn out to be because you gave them all of you. Children are suffering in the hands of those you leave them with for most of them don’t care and they just do it because of what they are gaining. Parents you can help reduce defilement cases by being available for your children because had Samia’s and Michael’s parents learnt of their predicament in the hands of those they were entrusted to they would be living normally.

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