DEAR PEOPLE PLEASERS

𝒀𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒅𝒂𝒚, 𝑰 𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒌𝒆 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒑𝒆𝒐𝒑𝒍𝒆 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒔. 𝑻𝒐𝒅𝒂𝒚, 𝒍𝒆𝒕'𝒔 𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒌 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 5 𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒑𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒂𝒚 𝑵𝑶 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉 𝒂𝒓𝒆: 

𝟏. 𝐑𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐠𝐧𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐨.

The first step to solving a problem is to first recognize and accept the fact that there's a problem. Do not lie to yourself.

 𝟐.𝐔𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐞𝐬.

Pay attention to your thoughts and feelings when you're asked to do something. Do you feel pressured to say yes? Are you afraid of disappointing someone? Do you feel like saying no would reflect badly on you? Understanding your motivation can help you make a decision that's in line with your values and priorities. Remember that it's okay to say yes sometimes! But if you find yourself saying yes out of guilt or obligation, take a step back and ask yourself if it's really what you want to do.

𝟑. 𝐏𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐨 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐲.

Be direct. Don't beat around the bush or try to soften the blow - just say no. Be polite, but firm. Say something like, "I appreciate the offer, but I'm not able to do that right now." Offer an alternative if you can. For example, if you can't attend an event, suggest a different time when you could meet up. Thank the person for understanding. Saying thank you shows that you value their time and respect their request, even if you can't say yes.

𝟒. 𝐒𝐞𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟.

Setting boundaries can be tough, but it's important for your mental and emotional health. Identify your boundaries. What are the things you need to feel happy and healthy? Maybe it's time alone, time with friends? Communicate your boundaries clearly and respectfully. Let the people in your life know what you need to feel your best. Don't apologize for having boundaries. It's okay to have needs and wants, and it's okay to communicate them. Don't feel guilty for prioritizing yourself.

𝟓. 𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫, 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐨 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟𝐢𝐬𝐡 - 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟-𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞.

We live in a society where saying yes is often seen as the right thing to do, but it's not always the healthiest choice for our well-being. Saying no can be difficult, but it's important to set boundaries and prioritize our happiness.

𝑁𝑂 𝑖𝑠 𝑎𝑙𝑠𝑜 𝑎𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑠𝑤𝑒𝑟. 𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑏𝑜𝑑𝑦. 𝐼𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑏𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑘 𝑑𝑜𝑤𝑛, 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑐𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑖𝑛 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑎 𝑤𝑒𝑒𝑘 𝑜𝑟 𝑎 𝑚𝑜𝑛𝑡ℎ. 𝐷𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑙𝑒𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑏𝑜𝑑𝑦 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑎 𝑏𝑎𝑑 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑜𝑛 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑠𝑎𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑁𝑂. 𝑆𝑎𝑦 𝑁𝑂 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜. 𝑆𝑎𝑦 𝑌𝐸𝑆 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜.  

𝐘𝐨𝐮… 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐞.

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