The other side of pain

Pain leaves hurt and sadness, that is the norm or better still the interpretation of it all. The hurt trying to fight the new reality wishing it wasn’t so or should I say hoping it was another nightmare they would wake up from. Nobody chooses pain but being humans such is due to happen as life is two-sided, at times we are happy and other times we are barely holding up due to hurt.

What if we take pain positively, what will the results be like? Good, I thought. When people hurt us we pray karma catches up with them because we feel sad and betrayed at the moment. There is a positive side, a blessing in disguise kind of thing if only we can brace up the new reality, dust it off, and focus on making it.

I have watched people grow from nothing, blossoming from what was meant to shatter and destroy them. They stopped the pity party thing and choose to grow despite everything not because they are too strong or over the pain but because they see beyond the pain, they have the urge not to be defined by it or let it decide their fate so they choose to fire back with the same bullet meant to destroy them.

Pain opens one’s eyes, you know what not to do again and who not to trust and that is something because you can now channel all the energy to bring out the better version of yourself. In as much as it did hurt it saved you from failing yourself and hurting yourself further because of being drained mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially.

People hurt us knowingly and unknowingly. For the unknowingly, the intentions weren’t to cause you pain hence can easily be rectified and forgiven while for the knowingly the offenders are aware that you might hurt you in the process but out of their selfishness they hardly care because of what they will gain in the process, they are mean and manipulative, avoid them but in case you fall in their trap, learn and grow through it, don’t become their victim all over again.

Set boundaries the moment you feel like they are asking for too much and so soon because you will get hurt when you’re no longer in a position to provide for them. Don’t be too available and accessible they will use you still. Know people’s character and react accordingly, don’t let them hurt you at your own expense but above all don’t let their hurt destroy you, they must never win. 

See opportunity in everything, you might not be too strong to take in the pain now and then but see it as something meant to straighten and get you back on track to succeed. The pain inflicted on you doesn’t necessarily define your end negatively if you can turn it around and use it as a workforce to better yourself. You can’t be extra careful in avoiding pain but you can be careful while giving it a role, the part it will play in turning your story around for the best.