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The Transparency of Single Moms

Dear Sisters,
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Being a mom is a powerful lens for viewing the amazing way that the Lord loves us. When you look through His transformative lens, you realize that if He has called you to motherhood then it can become an act of praise in itself. That your relationship with and response to your child should reflect evidence of the depth of the love we experience with Him.

And our circumstances may reflect a diverse range from raising children in traditional households to courageously operating through His power as single moms. In all of these dynamics, we must embrace that God is extending the chance for us to become better through the journey of raising our children.

Yet, the quiet truth is that for many single moms, it is also a journey that is shaped by a myriad of conflicting emotions. That for as much joy and fulfillment we experience, it is also infused with challenges that could be better responded to if we felt safe to share with other believers.

If we could be transparent, we would share the nights of weeping that questioned if joy would ever knock at morning's door. Or how we crumbled inside as children cried for fathers whose absence we could not explain and the inadequacy of feeling we were not enough on our own.

If we were transparent, we would express how overwhelming it can be to parent alone, work, go to school, work in the church ministry and make it all look good so we were awarded our superwoman card. If we were transparent, we could take our attention from coordinating our superwoman capes to our designer shoes and finally tell our truths with relief.

If only we could be transparent to one another, then we would see that we are not in this alone. That we are knitted into a community of believers so that we can help each other heal the brokenness, release our failures, and eventually learn to forgive ourselves. That the absence of these things translates into the presence of women transformed by the love of Christ and better equipped to reflect that same love at home.

If we were transparent, then we could look back over the journey and clearly see that God has been with us every step of the way. Otherwise, how did we do it? You may have looked to be doing it alone, but the truth is that you could not have survived it, much less excelled in your role without His power.

God knows what He placed in you and your children have demonstrated the evidence of that deposit of love. The only thing left is for you to see that the journey will end with "Well done, good and faithful servant." And now all that is left is for you to walk into it.

In addition to serving as a college dean and motivational speaker, Jothany Blackwood is the founder of MidWife Ministries, which supports ministers and churches in birthing their vision.

*Jothany Blackwood is a 2009 Guest Columnist.

(c) Jothany Blackwood all rights reserved.

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