Ugly crow glow up into beauty princess

Growing up was not an easy thing for me. When I first started school, it was all okay. I really loved every moment of that time. 1 to 5 grade I had a gang with three boys and two girls. We were really closed and no one concerned about others skin color or physical appearance.I felt like I was in heaven during that five years I spent in school with them.

Time flies. When I reached 7th grade, everything changed. All of the students were considering about the skin color and other stuff. From that time period to now, I have had Sri Lankan dark brown skin. But things got worse when entered 10th grade when I was 14years old. I got acne. I didn't really think about my pimples at first. It was a normal thing to me. But it becomes worse and worst. I saw people changed towards me and that really drag down my mental health. At that time, acne was taking over my life, making my entire college experience difficult. Throughout my childhood, I was subjected to intense bullying, and truthfully, I began to despise my appearance. At that age, I had never given my appearance much thought.

My colleagues saw me as a 'black crow'. They called me 'kalu kaputi' in Sinhalese. Having dark skin can be bad, but having dark skin with acne could be worse. As my acne grew, i felt extremely alone and isolated. It seems that i was the only girl who having acne full ugly face in the entire school.

My head was full of negative comments about my face. My acne become my major concern due to others negative comments and advices i received. People who I met in my day to day, all of them had some advice or horrible comment to deliver me about my face or my look. A lot of my friends have started to recommend skin care products and other things to me which make me disappointed about my appearance. It was like living a nightmare all day. Because of my skin condition, I was bullied and hated, which caused me to dislike everything about myself. I had a low self esteem. I never felt good enough. Imagine, i was at the age of every girl who seek attraction from opposite gender but i only got horrible comments and bad nick names. I wanted to be isolated. I don't need to face anyone anymore. I wanted to hide my face or cover it with a mask always. I was ashamed to give a direct look or have eye contact with others, especially my friends and family members. I was all alone. There was no hope at all. I started crying whenever i was alone.

Acne is a problem that goes beyond just the skin. It has a significant effect on mental health. I was suffered from anxiety, law self- esteem , poor self- image and PTSD also. I used to cry every day. The situation was unbearable for me. My isolation, shyness, and infrequent leaving of my room resulted in poor academic performance. During that period, i rarely left the house. My life was turned into a living hell by acne. Bullying and my appearance caused me to feel so down that I had a few suicidal thoughts. I tried everything on my acne. Nothing was helped. I was seen a dermatologist. Things getting worst. I got acne on my back also. I was suffering acne for 8 to 10 years since age 14. I’ve tried thousands of skin care products nothing cured my acnes.

After my teenage years i started to learn about skin conditions and hormonal changes and all skincare products. I also became obsessed with reading every thing about acne and pimples and started watching you tube videos about skin care products and influence stories about acne fighters. I studied every single thing about acne and skincare. so I could decide what wasn’t reacting well to my sensitive skin.

 In particular, it is to show the world that acne isn't a bad thing. It’s about changing the aspects of society and ending the negative perspective about acne and pimple. Please don’t let acne to control you or define you… it’s normal to have acne!!