Girls are always victims
Apr 28, 2022
I belong to a small village of Pakistan where Sister Zeph is working day and night to transform lives through education, awareness and skills.
I am on number two among three siblings. My elder sister I and our younger brother our father is a unique man in Pakistan because he did whatever he could to save life of my mother when she got cancer. He sold out our home for her treatment when all the money was spent because he loved her so much and wanted her to remain alive by all means. But she could not make it and died. We all left alone, our hearts were broken.
We were living at our uncle’s home who after sometime asked us to leave so we left and shifted in a rented home in front of home of Sister Zeph.
This is a small narrow street, two people hardly can walk together here and in this small, narrow street Sister Zeph is opening ways for women to live empowered lives.
Soon we had good terms with her family, She convinced me to pursue my education that I left in 9th standard after my mother got sick, but I always ignored it, then she asked me to learn stitching, I joined the stitching center, but it also felt like it was boring therefor I joined the beauty salon training center.
My elder Sister got a job in sister zeph’s center and things started going so well. I was happy with my life, but then my father got sick, he got so much worried for me because he thought if something bad will happen to him I will remain alone if will remain single because my brother and sister were already married
So he started looking for a match for me. Soon he found and within few months I got married.
I was happy to have own home and the love of my husband, but on the very first day I realized that that I was married to a wrong person, who was so proud and a strange person. He was a tailor and he wanted me to work with him so I would work at home all day, like a servant, I would wash cloths, dishes, would clean floors, would cook food three times a day, would help him in stitching and would serve him any time he wanted to.
After one month I realized I was pregnant. I thought now he will give me some time to rest in a day, but he asked me to stop talking to my family because it could kill my baby he said women should not talk to their family during pregnancy. But because I was pregnant my sister would call me because she was worried for my health. I was not allowed to have my own phone she would call on his cell, he started recording my calls. He would beat his sisters over small things and would call my family of lower class and people of less value. He would call my father with names over small things.
My blood pressure would remain high. One day I was so sick only few days were remaining in my delivery when I had to wash cloths all day, I had nothing to eat and until evening I was collapsed. They called a local Dr from the village that is not qualified to be a dr. he gave me an injection and I got unconscious when blood started coming out of my mouth they had to bring me to hospital. Doctors did an examine and found out that the baby was died inside the womb, they had to do major surgery to take out the dead baby, but while they were doing the surgery I had a swear heart attack, they left my opened womb as it is and started to deal with my heart. My heart did not beat in natural way for four days. My family was told by doctors that I will not survive, my body was swollen, my heart was not beating, my womb was opened, my baby was died, blood was coming from my mouth, ears and nose and my husband was doing politics to prove himself a caring husband.
Sister Zeph and her whole team were praying with my family, everybody was crying for me. My son was buried and I could not look at him even once, I have been feeling him in me for nine months, I made so many plans and saw so many dreams about him. He was part of me and I could not even touch him when he came into this world, his eyes were closed forever inside me because his father wanted to keep me in his control, because he thought if he would give me rest I would become lazy and would not look after the household well.
Luckily or unluckily I survived. It has been eight months since I am living at my parents’ home. I did not learn any good skill because I did not know what sister Zeph keep saying that really can happen to women after getting married therefor they should be empowered to face all the challenges that can happen to them in future.
He wants me to go back to his home, but he thinks he has not done anything wrong. During all these months he never came and cried with me over death of our son. He never came to ask me if I need anything, or how I am feeling, he never said he is missing me and he wants me to come back to him.
Today I have a job at sister zeph’s center I know I am not much qualified,but she gave me a job so that I do not die in loneliness, so that I can spend some time in doing something constructive.
I want to give a message to each and every girl on this girl’s day. ‘’ Do get education and focus on your career before getting married or you will not have a home''